When last we left Emmaryn, a group of invisible poltergeists (which I eventually decided to call "weedlings") had taken notice of her. Not only that, they seemed to be confused as to her nature. I was proud of the line, "What are you doing here with the humans?" Still am. It's designed to confuse Em and to raise questions with the reader who up until that moment was probably thinking Emmaryn was a human girl... or they might if the cover image didn't show her with faerie wings. Covers are designed to sell comics and sometimes that comes at the expense of a spoiler or two.
Actually, comic cover spoilers are fairly rare since they have to be done so far ahead of time for placement in Previews that often the cover artist has never seen the script he's illustrating. Sometimes it hasn't been written by then.
But back to Emmaryn: Yes, I feel I overdid the "unique look family resemblance" when it came to the lips of these characters. Seemed okay at the time, Brad Pitt thought so too. The dialogue of Amber's mom is meant to cover how the events could be brushed off by the adults. This happens in real life; people see all matter of weird things yet go on living their mundane lives. I mean, I know a woman who was in the center of a poltergeist event, prayed for her life then saw a group of 18 inch high "lizard men" hop over the back fence and continues to go about her daily life with no more concern than the rest of us. Really? But then it's supposed to be aerodynamically impossible for bees to fly yet they'll happily buzz right to your ass and sting you for suggesting it. Of course, the obvious answer is that the laws of aerodynamics are wrong which is not something you want to contemplate while standing in the boarding line of a transcontinental flight.
Continuing: Emmaryn's, "Why are you apologizing?" hints that she doesn't feel support from her mom, that her mom might think she's weird too. Something that would lead to a positive emotional moment later in the saga when she learns that he mom is definitely on her side. The silent panel that comes next is something that distinguishes comics from prose, the ability to describe a mood, a relationship, perhaps even the thoughts of the characters with a picture.
The next panel is a flashback panel, a technique Mike Mignola uses often. It's most effective when used with color because by shifting the color palette, it's even clearer to the reader that it's something plucked from another page. Although the dialogue line makes the same point, I don't think I'd use it as much if I was doing the comic in black and white.
Em returns to an empty room and the angle is chosen to portray her as small and lonely. The fact that the panel highlights the empty room at all is not usual. It subliminally suggests that this bedroom is special in some way which leads us to the flashback pages. The flashlight sparks memories of a time where weird creatures visited her when she was much younger.
The next two pages were featured earlier in the blog. Check the archives. I thought the coloring worked well, better than most of the pages.
Several people have written me to say that my self critiques are too harsh but I like to think that it's because my critical taste is better. I hope that will lead to better art. I'm more confident with my writing since it's largely how I make my living... although currently I'm working as a storyboard artist so who's to say?
Anyway, the weedlings' dialogue is more exposition but not done in an obvious way. Or at least I hope it is. Feel free to comment below if it worked for you or left you totally confused. It's chock filled with hints about Emmaryn's nature, her status in their world, the fact that their world has rules about being in the human world and even some foreshadowing of an important character, Mage Raven. Visually I was still playing with ways to make the guys read as being invisible, although there wasn't supposed to be a shadow on the word balloon. The pink and violet color scheme should read as Amber's room.
The shift to the blue/grey world of Emmaryn is an indicator of a location change. In the bottom three panels you can see how I use font size as an indication of volume.
Finally, a key line of every Emmaryn pitch I made was, "When most girls are worried about acne, Emmaryn broke out in wings." This page is the story of that moment. Also at this point the color runs out. That's not an artistic decision, I just felt I had enough color pages for pitching the comic. Plenty of font fun on this page too. This page is filled with gags that are trying to imitate the kind of gags that are usually done on film like the three panels in the top tier and the three on the bottom but I think they work here too. Emmaryn is placed in panel five so that she can look down at the close up of her feet in panel 6. I don't think comic panels should be thought of as storyboard sketches that describe bits of action. The placement of panels on the page can add to the storytelling.
So I think it's obvious I put some real thought into the pages but was I on the right track? I'd appreciate some input from you guys. That's why the comments are enabled!
Later -- Tad
The last page, #14, I absolutely love how you had her hit the ceiling, and then the way she calls for her mom. I can just picture it animated. The way she's flying up, it's clear how she's completely out of control and doesn't know what she's doing. The whole scene was conveyed really well! The way you draw poses and body language are clear enough that it wouldn't need to be explained with text.
One thing that confuses me; it switches from the scene with the Poltergeists at the sleepover to Emm suddenly waking up in her own home... does that mean all the girls went home the night of the sleepover, or is the story transitioning to a few days later?
Posted by: Angeline | 01/07/2010 at 10:31 PM
I figured the party broke up after the girls were threatened with point objects, smothering and assorted torture. It never occurred to me to explain that. I suppose it doesn't make a difference to the story, although if the rest had stayed it would increase Emmaryn's feeling of alienation. But on the other hand, if the reader is confused it takes them out of the story. It could've been easily covered in the dialogue between moms on the doorstep. --Tad
Posted by: Tadt | 01/09/2010 at 10:13 PM